GOD WILLING

Since time immemorial, man in ever-increasing numbers has been trying to differentiate himself from the slime and distance himself also from any notion of a God to stand hopefully in his heyday, proud, powerful, free, and master of all he surveys. In this so-called grand progressive march of civilization he has according to secular opinion evolved from primates and freed himself from primitive dependency, but now in his hour of glory and rugged individualism is to be found sitting behind his computer, maintaining his web pages, writing his blogs, and generally updating his social networking image, dependent as ever and hardly able to survive a day without communicating in cyberspace. This is not to say that everybody who logs in with undeviating frequency is a heathen. Still, it is an indication that such persons prefer to be connected to the World Wide Web rather than to the divine and will, in time, forsake their prayers, if any, for more questionable forms of communication.

It seems that man, after all, has not exempted himself from the “participation mystique” of the primitive but imagines now that he is calling the shots and, rather than meekly trying to placate the insurmountable forces of nature with ritual and worship, is in defiance bashing the keyboard of his computer to create his own virtual reality. He will not win, but be vanquished in time like all defiant mortals.

Who was or was not regarded as a participant in my adventure was not a matter of arbitrary decisions, depending on the mood, the weather, or whether the server was up or down, but was decided by the force of circumstances. The main participants were identified by their entrances and exits, thereby increasing the web of mystification.

One day, shortly after acquiring the silver pendant, I found myself seated on a shady part of the beech next to a well-dressed gentleman. I say I found myself because that day, like many days in Paradise, was filled with a mystical intensity that left no room for a decision, choice, or personal preference.

The cloth and cut of the gentleman’s light gray suit, his white shirt and tie, his polished black shoes, and his briefcase held relentlessly in one hand, in that seaside setting, looked painfully incongruous. If I had not been preoccupied with assessing the value of my newfound treasure, no doubt I would have wished that he was seated in a chair at least, and not on the bare sand — a situation that, besides ruining the crease in his pants, made his alien appearance there seem more than just chance, even providential. Whatever the reasons, he was definitely interested in my naïve speculations concerning the pendant, which I held reverently in my hands while studying it intently, like a child.

What exactly caused him to say “God willing,” I cannot recall. Still, I took his utterance to be spoken with more seriousness than would have been a mere cliché. Indeed, by it, he received my full attention and was immediately cast as a participant as I struggled to subdue my embarrassment at having shared such childish, naïve thoughts about my treasure with him. A handsome, clean-cut man, self-possessed and in his manly prime, I assessed him to be a pragmatic modern man of the Christian church who, attentive to the Lord’s earthly ministrations, had come to check out the simpleton from the Chinese tea house. His thoughtful silence made our brief encounter all the more poignant, which, as was usual in Paradise, was not marred by small talk. He could well have responded with derision or even with a few sanguine observations that demolished my illusion. Still, he chose to remain silent, and by so doing, let the magic do its work. In fact, now that I think of it, no dialogue in Paradise suffered from the frustrating exactitudes of polite conversation. That was an essential aspect of Paradise that struck a chord immediately, captivating all but the most straight-laced of visitors, rendering them wide-eyed and hopeful.

Not everyone I met automatically became a leading participant. While some maintained their neutrality, others became extras or took minor supporting roles. Our Baptist missionary, or whatever his designation was, was a key player who, in five minutes, played out his influential role.